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The Totally Spurious Victoria's Secret Thread


TheBaronOfFratton
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^Do they have it with Hi on the front and bye on the back? Cause if so, I'm totally buying one.

And now she's right where she belongs, shilling fugly sweat-pants and polka-dot bras with Elsa and the other forgettable bitches.

#BehatiWeeps

#TamTamRocks
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DOUTZEN KROES POSTCARD FROM PRAGUE

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Hi everyone! Having a lovely time in Prague, filming the new VS Christmas commercial!!! Here I am hanging out with Candice and Ale. Candice has to keep going off to do stuff though, poor her ☹ - but me and Ale have had a fun time exploring the city instead; it's great to have SO much free time whilst we're here!

Hey, guess what? Miranda had a baby too! How crazy is that? It's OK though because nobody mentions it and we're just two girls back from a break, and it's not like VS are making a big deal about it or anything with me.

Got to go, I'm getting to wear some wings this afternoon. MAJOR MOMENT apparently. Wish me luck!!!

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And there you though getting a Hi/Bye shot was the worst thing Victoria's Secret could do...

Ooh guuuuurl were you wrong.

Then again, she did ditch them for a successful movie career

Anyway, Suprious Productions present: that awkward moment where you ex-boss celebrates the fact that you're no longer working for them:

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Awww... Now what's up?

Are you feeling down because it looks like you've been passed over yet again for some fugly skinny bitch that nobody likes, and a bunch of no-marks who won't be back? Yes? Well - sigh no more, with the all new, all fun, all massively logo'd:

INSTANT VICTORIA'S SECRET FASHION SHOW ANGEL KIT!

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Yes, now you too can pretend to walk the show in the privacy of your own home on November 9th by adding these accessories to a bunch of tat you found in your dressing-up box at grandma's house and some cobbled together shit out of the garage! No more need to be sad - everyone's an "Angel" these days anyways, and you will be too with the:

INSTANT VICTORIA'S SECRET FASHION SHOW ANGEL KIT!

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There - that's better!

(Please note: wings sold separately. Does not include special Selita Rumble Pack Edition which allows wear to actually be at the show for unfathomable reasons.)

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Awww... Now what's up?

Are you feeling down because it looks like you've been passed over yet again for some fugly skinny bitch that nobody likes, and a bunch of no-marks who won't be back? Yes? Well - sigh no more, with the all new, all fun, all massively logo'd:

INSTANT VICTORIA'S SECRET FASHION SHOW ANGEL KIT!

Yes, now you too can pretend to walk the show in the privacy of your own home on November 9th by adding these accessories to a bunch of tat you found in your dressing-up box at grandma's house and some cobbled together shit out of the garage! No more need to be sad - everyone's an "Angel" these days anyways, and you will be too with the:

INSTANT VICTORIA'S SECRET FASHION SHOW ANGEL KIT!

There - that's better!

(Please note: wings sold separately. Does not include special Selita Rumble Pack Edition which allows wear to actually be at the show for unfathomable reasons.)

:laugh: Too bad this one isnt totally spurious though. I wonder how many girl buy all of thst VSFS-affiliated stuff

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Random observations that occurred last night (with due deference to Prettyphile):

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Suffer with unsightly glitterball hemmorrhoid problems? Tired of lugging around late 70's nightclub accoutrement bum-piles? Then you need DISCO CREAM:

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What the hell is this - VS Burkas? Tapping into that lucrative Islamic-lingerie market?

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Pah! Who needs Cintia when you can have Anja? :ermm:

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Job lot of umbrellas - buy 2 get 3rd free. Seems a shame to waste 'em...

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File under: UNDIGNIFIED. If you're going to defecate on the runway could you please have the good grace not to do so whilst Behati is walking beside you. This is most off-putting...

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"Welcome to my magical lady-garden!"

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"Hey, Erin? Erin! Erin! You see that girl, Anne? Yeah..? Yeah I'm like TOTALLY tapping that. Sweet as, man! Yeah. Hey! Hey, you wanna maybe come around after too Erin? Yeah - we're staying over the road. Room 221. You cool with that? Anne like let's me have sex with her and EVERYTHING! Yeah, gonna buy me some beers too. Got an ID. SWEEET! No? No, Erin? OK, cool... Yeah I'm cool with that. Yeah. OK... I'm gonna get me some anyway Erin. Yeah... Beers and sex... Yeah...

Yeah - fuck you Erin... FUCK YOU! Whatever."

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(I'm going to post this on the discussion thread too, for those who think they're above this thread! Selita must be found...)

I´ve actually sent Mr. Holmes after her

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and in case he failed, Three Investigators are sent immidiately!

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do you think I´m done? :shifty: NO! In ANY case, I have still Famous Five in my hands... :shifty:

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Timothy will get ya, Selita!! :baronlamesign:

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Dear Alessandra,

We are happy to inform you that your picture has been removed from the encyclopedia entry for burn.

Hi Doutzen

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Bye Doutzen

The ultimate burn shall now be known as "The Doutzen Treatment." In honor of this milestone achievement, we will be releasing exclusive t-shirts available in the hot new Christmas colors of blue and purple.

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Get yours quickly! They'll only be available for one second.

LMAO!!! That's a good one.

curse you candice :angry:

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