Michael*

Thor: Ragnarok Release Date: October 27, 2017 Director: Taika Waititi Synopsis Thor is imprisoned on the other side of the universe without his mighty hammer and finds himself in a race against time to get back to Asgard to stop Ragnarok - the destruction of his homeworld and the end of Asgardian civilization - at the hands of an all-powerful new threat, the ruthless Hela. But first he must survive a deadly gladiatorial contest that pits him against his former ally and fellow Avenger - the Incredible Hulk. Cast Chris Hemsworth - Thor Tom Hiddleston - Loki Idris Elba - Heimdall Cate Blanchett - Hela Tessa Thompson - Valkyrie Mark Ruffalo - Bruce Banner / Hulk Karl Urban - Skurge Anthony Hopkins - Odin Jeff Goldblum - Grandmaster

What with Chelsea apparently still owning the trademark to Mourinho's name, surely he should be forced to change it Pro Evolution Soccer-style if he wants to manage United.

While Van Gaal's funny ways alienated a lot of the fans, he's left United in a decent position - if not one of immense strength, then certainly with firm foundations and good potential. It'll get harder and harder for the club to remain a marketing powerhouse while finishing fifth and playing stodgy, conservative football, but if Jose delivers Champions League qualification and restores them to being something of a feared team, they'll probably put it down as a win and accept whatever mess he creates on his way out.

However tangled Van Gaal's logic became, and in fairness it was like he was going out of his way to play players out of position towards the end, his thinking was crystal clear in comparison to those higher up the totem pole at United. Next season is already shaping up to be a strange one in the Premier League. Mourinho and Guardiola have a history of taking over teams with an existing and successful core of players in their early to mid twenties, then riding the wave of success and leaving when it starts to subside a bit. Neither Manchester club could realistically lay claim to those strengths at the moment, both probably need about half a dozen new faces each to get to the level their managers are used to, then perhaps another two or three to get them to the next level.

Where the first trailer felt just that little bit too silly, this one suggests that there's going to be more depth to the movie, and not just as an excuse for the outrageous set pieces. The fact that they're hiding an actor of Idris Elba's calibre under a mountain of CGI is pretty disappointing, but overall I'm looking forward to it a lot more now. But they're not going to destroy the Enterprise again, are they?

Hello, good evening and welcome!

Extremely bloody hell, almost eight years between posts there. Anyway, that was a pretty good trailer. Michael being alive isn't beyond the realms of possibility, although T-Bag being free and back on the streets doesn't really make much sense. Not that it's hard to understand why they would have wanted to bring him back, he was always one of the highlights of the show.

Hello, good evening and welcome!

Xia has bagged one of the most famous clubs in the English game for the price of two Roberto Soldados. I suppose the hope is that he's already looking at the sustainable models, not only at the likes of Swansea and Southampton, but also analysing how many Spanish and German clubs are able to enjoy more successes with fewer resources than their English counterparts, many of whom have been stuck in the 'Harry Redknapp football consultant' mindset for far too long. Any preferences for a new manager, Fred?

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As much as I'd love for an England manager to eschew tradition completely and stop naming over-hyped duffers like Rooney in the squad, I think for the most part, you'd have to say that the realistic alternatives are no better or worse than the ones who got in. There are some whose inclusion you could obviously make a case for, like Noble, Carrick, Baines or Jagielka, but whether or not any of those four would make a vast difference to the squad's performance, I would have my doubts. Genuine 'outside the box' options are fairly thin on the ground, too. Michail Antonio should probably have been given a chance by now, and I would certainly have had Jermain Defoe in there ahead of Rooney and Rashford. Then again, I suppose I would say that.

If his Real Madrid predecessor's career trajectory is anything to go by, old 'ZZ Top' could easily be managing in the Championship by this time next year.

Roy's England squad more or less as expected, then. At first glance it's a group with good potential, but one that in recent months has shown an alarming lack of form (Rooney, Stones, Sterling, Delph, Lallana), fitness (Sturridge, Wilshere, Henderson), motivation (Barkley), self control (Vardy, Drinkwater, Alli, Dier), and composure under pressure (Spurs). I'd like to be proved wrong, but I suspect that we'll once again be found out in the early going, although we may have enough up front this time to make up for some of the obvious deficiencies elsewhere.

I'm so relieved that we were already safe going into the game against Watford, officiating like yesterday's would be your absolute worst nightmare if you were fighting for survival on the last day. It's taken Big Sam most of the season to arrive at a system good enough to make it hard for the opposition to beat us, but he's done an excellent job of it. He appears to have full control over recruitment, and as far as I can tell, is very good at getting the right players in and the wrong players out. This was our tenth year in the top flight, and the eleventh will be our biggest and (most probably our last) opportunity to consolidate. My fingers are well and truly crossed that by this time in 2017, we'll be just another dull middle order Premier League project.

As may be obvious, I bloody loved it. There wasn't a moment I'd change, and it's a struggle to think when I last felt that about a movie. What struck me was how much of it was the culmination of careful planning, it really felt like a continuation of 'Winter Soldier' with every plot point linking to Bucky, and that made it so much more cohesive than 'Ultron'. Things like Tony's parents, his guilt complex, Ross's attitude to the group, and the overall effect of past movies came to natural conclusions, but within the context of Steve's desire to keep his friend safe, which was obviously the emotional core. I think the Russos have demonstrated the best understanding of villains in the MCU so far, too. It’s no bad thing to have a Loki or Ultron in reserve for the next big smashy blockbuster, but it's a well that could easily run dry if they're not careful.

The thing about Deadpool is that he's a pretty niche character who doesn't have a great deal of recognition beyond very specific circles. Fox's marketing department made up for that by bringing in viewers who were just as interested in seeing it as a raunch comedy as they were in seeing it as a superhero story. I wouldn't say it worked because it was R-rated though, far from it. I think it worked because it was anarchic and irreverent and used the freedom of that rating to amp up those elements. It took advantage of existing inside a known universe and subverting it, a bit like punk rock kicking against a more corporate product.

Another one to really look forward to. I was excited about Boseman in the title role even before 'Civil War', but the prospect of seeing more of T'Challa's world on the big screen got a whole lot more intriguing afterwards. The supporting cast looks stellar. Jordan is one of the most promising actors of his generation, and Lupita Nyong'o can pretty much do no wrong in my eyes. It's a real shame that the X-Men universe is off-limits, she could have killed it as Storm. I'm not that familiar with Coogler's work, but for this to be a genuinely Afrocentric story rather than a mix-up of developing world stereotypes, Wakanda will need to be handled with care. Fingers crossed that he's up to the task.

I must have pressed the quote button before finalising the switch, so for good measure, I've edited your new username into my last post. Future quotes should automatically display the new name from now on, too.

Sorry, but name changes are only granted to members who have been here for three months or more. The only exception we make is when a member has accidentally misspelled their display name.

For four consecutive seasons now, we've walked the exact same path. Start the season calamitously, the manager is sacked, a new one parachutes in and, by hook or by crook, drags us to safety. At various points along the way we look completely doomed, obituaries are written and then torn up when we pull away from danger at the eleventh hour. Unfortunately for many of us, this club is infectious, rarely through quality but through passion and effort, bravery and stubbornness. One of these days, we might actually get it together and become a half decent, stable Premier League side, like I vaguely remember us being for about half an hour at the start of the decade. Perhaps if we're really lucky, we'll look back on next season's campaign and recall just how bloody uneventful it all was.

Done.

Not sure if it's going to mean much in the grand scheme of things, but the phone number is certainly real enough. This is the voicemail message you hear if you ring it.

I thought it was really good. It was more dense than Daredevil which, while also excellent, takes more of a 'by the book' approach to superhero action. This brought some real issues to the fore, and I liked the fact that the questions and the grey areas of complex morality arose from the plot in more of a natural way, instead of being grafted onto it. Slightly mixed feelings on Kilgrave though, I somehow felt that the more I saw of him, the less effective he became as the villain. During the first half of the season, he was probably only onscreen for about a quarter of an hour in total, and came off as legitimately terrifying.

Tuned in last night as a neutral hoping for a good game. Not quite sure how City pulled it off, but they managed to isolate Aguero, concede the midfield and look vulnerable on the break, all at the same time. That certainly takes some doing.