Frederick

Maybe I should buy some of the early years on DVD. But would I really sit down and watch them all?

Police have raided three clubs as part of an investigation into alleged corruption in football. And guess what? One of them is Newcastle. In other news, the Pope has revealed an interest in Catholicism.

Bardsley wasn't good enough for us so he definitely isn't good enough to be at Man United. I'm guessing he'll be at Sunderland before too long.

Happy birthday, DK!

Sylvie van der Vaart's pretty cute. The rest, meh.

Martin still has an effect, and as Ed says, he inherited a helluva lot of crap players, most of whom have now been shown the door. At the very least our body language is so much more positive than it used to be, we play football which is actually often decent to watch and we have a crop of decent young players coming through. So while we won't be breaking the glass ceiling of the top four, considering how things were a year ago, we're pretty satisfied with the new regime.

Ally McBeal is the television equivalent of a woman eating ice cream after her boyfriend breaks up with her and then spending the rest of the night on the toilet, realising that she's illurgic to pistachio nuts.

Villa and mediocre have been words keenly associated for about the last twenty five years. Welcome aboard, Nigel!

Do people still name their children names like Nigel? Apparently they do because Villa bought Reo-Coker for the pricely sum of £8.5 million a week or so ago.

Serpentine Gallery Summer Party, London

Going back a bit, didn't Carter have a drug addict cousin who ended up going mentaly ill? Or something. Am I making that up or scrambling memories?

Kristin Kreuk is the purtiest. But mad props to Sarah Carter, when she showed up for a few episodes, the camera was damn nearing melting.

Kruger Confidential. I don't get it, is there a pun in there somewhere?

Awesome!

So I was minding my own business the other day, out on the mean streets of life, when suddenly Michael Ballack's brooding billboard presence introduced me to Chelsea's hideous new away shirt. I was later ill.

Oh yeah, they lost a baby. I remember that one, that was pretty darn sad. Thandie Newton kind of sucks, though.

Didn't Thandie Newton come in as Carter's wife for a bit? What the hell was that all about?

More!

She's a doll. And what a great name. Wow.

At least it weakens Schalke. Therefore, justice for all.

Should they give Bayern the trophy now or wait 'til Christmas?

Connery aint doing this. Meaning his last film role was The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. Not cool.

Benoit was great. Really great. This is all terribly sad.

Unless they get the referees on their side. Wouldn't be the first time!