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Frederick

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  1. Frederick

    Euro 2020

    You'd be heartless not to feel for the Hungarians, Germany were frighteningly bad in every which way imaginable. God knows who'll show up on Tuesday, the bundle of energy that ripped through Portugal or the incoherent nowhere men of last night (yes, we could obviously lose to both). If Southgate doesn't set his silkiest greyhounds on ol' man Hummels, I'll be calling into Talksport to declare it an act of treason.
  2. Frederick

    Euro 2020

    Bit better, though suffice to say the Mail went with "Rampant Lions roar into Euros last 16" which is a bit like the old days of NME proclaiming a band the best in the world based on one good middle-eight from their debut EP. Seemed to me H-Magz for Mings was a bit pointless but Saka's selection worked out, Jack drew the fouls and bagged the assist, Kane had a bit more about him, even Irrelevant Till You're United Sancho was permitted entry onto the field of play for the barest of sniffs. The Czechs are alright, I'd be surprised if any team blew them apart in the knockouts.
  3. Frederick

    Euro 2020

    *Checks off Ousmane Dembele Tournament Ending Injury on his Euro 2020 bingo card*
  4. Frederick

    Euro 2020

    Bold is the coach who lets an 80 year-old Pepe on the same pitch as Gnabry. The Wembley big screen whooper-a-thon isn't meshing with Uncle Gareth's pragmabore ways, a hairy arsed contest out in Baku would probably suit this team.
  5. Frederick

    Euro 2020

    Move the game to 6am or whenever it was we played Nigeria in 2002 and maybe the masses won't mind as much? In lieu of an intriguing sporting contest, they could bring in John Motson to talk about breakfast, as I recall him doing for the entirety of that World Cup, even when the game before him was quite good. Or install Wazza Roo on the pitch at the end for a bit of "night to have ya own fans boo ya!" Algeria 0-0 energy and just burn the whole thing down.
  6. Frederick

    Euro 2020

    Anemic about covers it. Scotland did what it said on the tin and credit to them, meanwhile we the ones with all the "vibrant ball carriers" seem to have decided that the one decent move we had against Croatia was an aberration to be frightened of, that "patient build-up" capped off with a clipped ball over the top (the heavier the better!) to a clapped out Hazza K. is the be-all and end-all move. Three man comm box was a good touch by ITV, though, enabling Ally and Dixie to crowd out Matterface's amped up prattle. Hey, they can stop showing that Gazza goal now!
  7. Frederick

    Euro 2020

    Dortmund Always Give Yoof A Chance...except when they don't. A proper mishandling of a special talent, knew it then, know it now.
  8. Frederick

    Euro 2020

    Credit to El Chimpface (woeful pen aside), Rambo (bad misses aside) and the rest of the bechgyn for a job well done, Turkey barely looked arsed going forward even with the crowd baying them on. I shall be making other plans for when they play the Swiss, that's for sure.
  9. Frederick

    Euro 2020

    "Yippee, Alvaro Morata." - no one ever.
  10. Frederick

    Euro 2020

    The A Shot at Glory thespian brings an everyman's amiable curiosity to the job; not only that, he's every bit as good in a panel setting as he is in the co-comm thunderdome. His chemistry with Jon Champion, in particular, is very winning and didn't half make some of those dour Christmas Amazon games zip along. As for Andy's posting in the wilds of the Great White North, I'm afraid chalk it up to John Oates syndrome (note: I reject the premise that John Oates isn't fantastic on his own, personally, but I'm using a known cultural shorthand. Also, I recognise comparing Clive Tyldesley
  11. Frederick

    Euro 2020

    Clive Tyldesley was definitely ready to roar "TIMBERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!" with appropriate effervescence in the event the young defender bagged himself a goal last night (Jonathan Pearce would've likewise done the moment justice). Meanwhile overpromoted Sam Matterface and his gravelly mouth full of sandpaper would've, of course, undersold the occasion while Guy Mowbray has time and again shown he lacks sufficient lung capacity for the big moments. Is it too late to bring in Kevin Keegan as a co-comm or does Euro 96 nostalgia only extend so far with the powers-that-be?
  12. Frederick

    Euro 2020

    Job done. Group stage football in a nutshell really: occasional glimpses of skill and verve but largely a tepid affair lacking ambition. That said, only wild horses could drag me away from a weekday afternoon date with Scotland-Czech Republic.
  13. Frederick

    Football

    I'll go cagey draw with Croatia, a scabby win over the overenthusiastic Scots ala Wales Euro 2016 (a McGinn booking before the 10th minute, naturally) before a functional victory against the Czechs that gets the #ItsComingHome crew foaming into their Deliveroos, while the smugo podcasting class distract themselves with bigger thoughts, e.g why Spurs should sign North Macedonia's right-back based on a couple of tidy throw-ins in one game, how France-Germany affects Daniel Levy, and why Finland-Russia is a game Arsenal fans should pay particular attention to because Arteta's ninth choice central
  14. Frederick

    Football

    Has Ancelotti's backroom staff for Real being confirmed yet? With Big Dunc chasing him, Hazard would be as fit as a butcher's dog!
  15. Frederick

    Football

    Their recent tonking of Sevilla caught my attention (while the victory over Arsenal raised the barest of chuckles given its sheer inevitability); Lord knows an outfit with Bacca, Moreno and wee Paco should have a certain agreeable flavour to it. That being said, the Europa final was absolute pants till the banter ending. 120+ minutes in the company of BT Sport's deep bench of cack pundits didn't help.
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