Frederick
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Everything posted by Frederick
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Clue II: Island of Enthusiasm
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Finally Keys and Gray, two oiky, self-satisfied toads who've spouted inane bollocks for nigh on twenty years, are gone. I don't know what I'll miss more, the pedantic non-stories whistled up for "The Last Word" or the elaborate sex toy style levers Gray relentlessly messed around with on Monday Night Football. I maintain my position that broadcasters should put Tom & Jerry cartoons on instead of a pre-match show or any half-time analysis. Trust me, it would drastically reduce alcoholism, divorce and teen pregnancy levels across the country.
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Dats a shower, brah.
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The pace at which the whole thing happened was indeed bizarre, I came home on Monday evening to a flood of (well, five) e-mails all about us possibly being in for Bent, and then less than 24 hours later I again came home only to find the whole deal complete. Growing up I was more used to watching us mess up signing Juninho, or having to hold a pound sign in protest over Doug's refusal to cough enough money to buy Juan Pablo Angel. Oh Randy, so brash, so fearless! When Houllier came in I did have a teeny, tiny concern that Owen might surface here, though in reality I'm not sure if even Sven's Leicester would touch 'em. Oh who am I kidding, of course they would.
Fargo?
You're a class act, Michael and I certainly would never want to come across as smug, nor condescending about your club. Hell, an awful lot of what you just said mirrors my own views about Villa. That being said, I think it would take a lot for me to feel blind sided about any transfer at this point, possibly because every time we sell a player it takes bloody ages, but also because there don't seem to be any players in the Premiership that you can clutch on to as noble exceptions. Its not that the 'olden days' weren't dictated by money as well, its just that the broo ha ha around individual players was much less intense then, whereas now we're fed the same rhetoric from an analogue age at a time when we know much, much better. I still get surprised by certain managerial sackings, though. Which is silly. P.S: 10,000 posts in this thread. As Ric Ocasek once said, let the good times roll!
Thank you very much, Berno!
I have to say some of the coverage of the Bent transfer has been quite amusing to me, you'd have thought we'd just bought a tin of rice pudding for 89 trillion the way folks are harping on. Of course Sunderland supporters are completely entitled to say whatever they want, but the media's snooty contempt for us continues to hover like a bad fart post-Martin O'Neill. Now Martin was mostly great for us and make no mistake, was a big ol' media darling, but come on now, we're not a gang of rats that betrayed our beloved pied piper, he left us, we didn't sack him. I still think Randy should have dealt with the situation a lot better, but still, there it is; a fiasco that became an embarrassment that lead to an avalanche of terror and woe that lasted for...well, its arguably still going on (on the pitch, at least). I'm rambling. Anyway, I like Randy even if his Terrence Malick approach to publicity occasionally works against us, I thank Martin for his four years at the club, and hope Bent does well and that we can keep all of our best players. But as trite as it sounds, we are bigger than any given individual and always have been. Say we're unfashionable, say we're crap to watch but the name over the counter is still worth something (80k a week if reports are to be believed). Villa supporters may come off as whiny, bitter faced drones seething in their own sense of entitlement and...well, okay, its completely true, but don't mock us for suddenly being a bit excited. This is all directed at Pat Murphy, Oliver Holt, Jim White of Sky Sports News, etc, etc.
Lovely though it is, its time to retire my current signature. Would anyone mind whipping something up for me using the following pictures? And as per usual, if you could insert 'Frederick' somewhere on the banner. Thanks very much.
One signing was never going to solve our many, many problems but given how toothless we are up front having Bent certainly can't hurt. In fact all he has to do is complete one successful forward pass and he'll have surpassed Stephen Ireland.
Seems to me that the two big stains on Dalglish's managerial record involve falling out with Freddy Shepherd and not being able to turn John Barnes into a tactical genius. The audacity of the guy! Impenetrably voiced crank with possible criminal affiliations? Sure. Out of touch? With what, how crap Liverpool are? I'd say he's had a pretty good vantage point. Besides, they don't deserve Klopp.
You'd think we'd have come into today's game with our tails up but nah, not this bunch. To name but a few grievances: Gabby out on the wing, Ashley in the middle and then the sheer indignity of subbing our admittedly woeful captain (and he was so good on Sunday!) for a 5ft6 nipper who ended up inexplicably playing in central defence while Dunne brainlessly huffed and puffed up front. All while our sole summer signing presumably sits warmly on the fur sofa in his pink mansion. The Chelsea performance, only hours ago one of the few sources of pride from this woeful season, now infuriates me as it was nothing more than a cruel ruse. They play one game at full tilt and then the next like lost souls. Why? I'm the least "blame the manager for everything" guy on earth but Houllier walks like a hopeless case, enforces tactics that suggest a hopeless case and talks absolute nonsense like a hopeless case. Would I sack him? I don't know, then what? I blame the players for a lot of this, even ones that I have vehemently defended in the past (Cuellar) have been royally pissing me off. Meanwhile Robert Pires looks like he's the caretaker waiting to lock up the ground, every time I see him yawning on the bench I hang my head in shame. There is a nucleus in this squad that can get us of this shameful position but they're being played out of position, left on the bench or simply not delivering. We're in no way too good to go down and I urge you all to report any Villa fans you hear voicing such claims to your local policeman immediately. So dire is the situation that I'm actually relieved our impending FA Cup 3rd round defeat is a one off game that doesn't affect our already apocalyptic goal difference. If Klopp ends up Liverpool manager I'm taking up darts and leaving all of this behind me.
I've had almost no words to describe how bad we've been this season, I mean why even attempt to articulate the sorrow you feel after a ludicrous 6-0 defeat against Newcastle? Selling Milner? Well we knew that was coming. Ireland? Load of old brown. Houllier? Give him time. Then suddenly we got really bad, so bad in fact that even when we occasionally won it still felt like we probably lost. Over Christmas we looked feeble, bored, annoyed with the world... Today we were fabulous with extra mustard. That must have been Petrov's best game for us, the lad looked born again, fighting like Mayweather, passing with authority; even Little Nigel was on song. Heskey, Heskey, Heskey; good grief, what can you say? Literally handcuff Young to keep him if need be. Friedel, not bad for a 72 year-old Hell's Angel! And just when you think Albrighton's gone and ruined the whole darn picnic, he produces a cross that Jason Wilcox himself would have been proud of. Bonus satisfaction: the highly mawkish, bouncy hugs that Chelsea partook in after they "won" the game.
Everything I've seen this year has been at the very least a solid night's entertainment, but in terms of 'top dogs' I'd say these four: Todd Rundgren Supergrass Sir Paul of McCartney Gorillaz Bonus points for 68 year-old Paul, who played a three hour show that included an impromptu performance of Ram On.
THIS DAY IN HISTORY: ASTON VILLA VERSUS WEST BROM SPECIAL 1066: As much of the population heads to Hastings for a fight in a field, an equally epic contest takes place some 200 miles away as Aston Villa host West Bromwich Albion at Villa Park. Though dominant in possession and utterly brilliant in every way, West Brom fail to win. 1666: As the Great Fire of London causes havoc across the East End, up in the Midlands plucky Aston Villa entertain West Bromwich Albion at Villa Park. Despite playing lots of lovely football and being as good as the Brazil side of 1970, West Brom stun the entire universe by not winning. Etc, etc, etc, infinity.
