Frederick

Another wacky result in our wacky season! Can we pretend to play Norwich every week? Lambert seems to delight in sticking it to his former employers though of course I knew Wes "Messi" Hoolahan would have a blinder today after our doomed romance during the transfer window. At least he refused to celebrate his goal, bless 'em. Anyway, things were looking a familiar shade of bad until Big Ben offered a moment of unparalleled genius to set us on our way. Great win, great response.

You have to feel for Sunderland, City barely lumbered out of second gear all afternoon but for this frenetic little spell at the beginning of the second half during which they just so happened to deliver two pinpoint silver bullets, one of which was so fantastically silly that it may have been directly lifted from an edition of Roy of the Rovers. After that you knew it wasn't to be.

Its unthinkable to me that he won't be back in yellow and black next season.

He's alright but a 'streaky' player by default. Questionable attitude for sure though in England he was pretty much solely managed by old school hard cases that were probably never going to get the best out of him.

Watching Man U and Schalke

Dodgy (Scottish) officials, a half empty stadium but a giant leap towards the quarter-finals.

Worst weekend ever. First, Hamburg stuff Dortmund like they always do, even though they're hilariously rubbish and haven't kept a clean sheet since the Keegan era. Needless to say, perfect preparation for a trip to Zenit St. Racistsburg. But then Villa somehow manage to the lower tone further with a charmless, guileless, pigheaded second half display against a team that haven't scored since Jimmy Nail last topped the charts. Never mind Grant Holt, Michelle McManus would have offered better movement upfront than Benteke today. Two weeks off, warm weather training in Portugal and they play like a hungover pub side. Its a disgrace.

Moyes watching Kroos with a view to buy? What next, Lambert to 'monitor' Hummels? Pulis to assess Sneijder? Allardyce to violently chew gum vaguely in the direction of Pastore? Do me a favour...

Who wants to guess what happened next? #whoops

Pellegrini says you can't expect a mere Swede to deliver in a game of such magnitude! But....

The revolting, despicable, dastardly Magath to Fulham!!!!

Maybe if we'd shown up in the first half we'd have given Cardiff the thrashing they so clearly deserved. Easily the worst team we've faced all season, I'd bet the proverbial farm that they're Gunnar get relegated. Definitely two points dropped. Delighted by the past few days at BVB, absolute demolition job of the rancid Bremen and now into a cup semi. Surprised the wretched, gutless Hamburg haven't forfeited the game against Bayern already, could be a cricket score.

So Pochettino is the eighth longest serving manager in the Premier League though I suppose he shares the rank with his translator.

Laudrup gone. No real surprise what with all the protracted hullabaloo in the summer.

Cabaye and chips all round, Big Joe Kinnear resigns!

Oh my dear sweet West Bromwich Albion, we gave you 2-0 leads in the first ten minutes of both games and you've ended up with a grand total of one point. :brows:

Congratulations to Michael's men for reaching the League Cup final in heroic, if ultimately rather farcical circumstances. Anyone doubting England's claim on Januzaj need only look to his abysmal penalty as proof that he's one of us.

Possibly our best performance of the season. Don't let the goal chronology fool anyone we did not crumble under overwhelming pressure nor did we park the bus, only Suarez's "nous" got them back to parity (maybe I should question the chosen referee's place of birth?) and thereafter we were just as likely to go and nick it as them. Thankfully Benteke looks rejuvenated now he's back in the goals while the addition of Bertrand is a clear improvement on Luna though we could definitely still do with one or two in (and frankly, one or two out). Has Moyes made a bid for Lee Carsley yet?

Haven't seen much of the boy at Sunderland but he looked lively at Augsburg last season. Moments when he looked the part for us were few and far between, but he was never used in his preferred position and was treated appallingly by Di Canio. Get him super fit and in the right headspace (which I’m almost certain Klopp will be able to do), he could become a real star. Confusingly enough he'll be making his second debut for Augsburg against Dortmund next weekend. Will probably score, miss a penalty, get sent off and or do a cruciate!

Welcome aboard, gents!

Haven't seen much of the boy at Sunderland but he looked lively at Augsburg last season.