Kiss Kiss Bang Bang Perry: Look up idiot in the dictionary. You know what you'll find? Harry: A picture of me? Perry: No! The definition of idiot. Which you fucking are! Harry: [after meeting "Gay Perry"] Still gay? Perry: No, knee-deep in pussy. I just love the name so much I can't get rid of it. Harry: Do you think I'm stupid? Perry: I don't think you'd know where to put food at, if you didn't flap your mouth so much. Yes I think you're stupid. Perry: So she comes to the door and she is totally nude, from head to toe. And she leads me inside and I sit down, right? Well, then she sits right on my lap. Harry: Really? That happened? Perry: No. Idiot. Harry: [narrating] I tell him about destiny; he's shaking his head. About dreamgirls; he doesn't care. I mention the underwear thing? He has a *fucking conniption*. And you? How 'bout it, filmgoer? Have you solved the case of the - the dead people in L.A.? Times Square audiences, please don't shout at the screen, and stop picking at that, it'll just get worse. Harry: I swear to God, it's like somebody took America by the East Coast, and shook it, and all the normal girls managed to hang on. Harmony: OK, everyone who hates Harry raise your hand! [all the girls in the club raise their hands] Perry: See that? Obedient little bitches too. [Girl screams "Fuck you!" and throws a glass, which he dodges] Perry: Merry Christmas, sorry I fucked you over. Harry: No problem. Don't quit your gay job. Perry: This isn't good cop, bad cop. This is fag and New Yorker. Perry: [on the phone with Harmony] I shot him with a small revolver I keep near my balls.
