Not guilty. That's just mean.

Pretended to be someone's friend for benefits?

Not Guilty.

Ever broken something really valuable?

Guilty

Broke something and blamed someone else?

Guilty.

Peed on someone?

Not guilty.

Cheated on a test?

Guilty.

Copied a book report from the internet?

Who hasn't? Guilty.

Copid homework directly from a friend?

Guilty

Hit on your teacher?

Not guilty.

Faked a late pass?

I hit on a few of my teachers

Not Guilty

Ran a red light?

Well, only the hot ones.

Well, I've legitimately "run" through a red light.

Stolen a candy bar from a conveinience store?

Well when the teacher is only about 24 and she leans over and smells nice

Not Guilty.

Broken a bone on someone else?

Thankfully, no.

Broken a bone on purpose (Why you would do that, I don't know.)?

ugh no

Hit someone in the head with a hammer?

ugh not guilty

Hit someone in the head with a hammer?

Nope.

Thrown sand in someones face?

Guilty

Spiked someone's drink?

Not guilty

Spit in someones food?

Not guilty

Ruined someone's hair for fun?

Of course. Her hair was looking way too nice that day...

Bought someone a present just so that you could also benefit from it?