August 12, 20186 yr Author On 8/8/2018 at 5:51 PM, frenchkiki said: I guess it's true for any city in the world I adore Paris so I am maybe not the right person to answer this. good point Hmmph...maybe I should ask Hitler?
August 20, 20186 yr Author Conservatives are so stupid and demented as to be Autistic On the bright side, the best that liberals can do is Asperger's
September 12, 20186 yr Author All blonde Russian supermodels fall madly in love with wrinkled, liver-spotted, half deaf pieces of wood. It's a perfectly normal relationship!
October 4, 20186 yr Author The last president that anybody wanted to fuck was JFK. A woman president could be voted in if guys wanted to fuck her. If a female candidate with lots of sex appeal ever came along, her entire campaign could be “So vote for me and maybe I'll fuck ya”. She'd win by a landslide 'cause guys will do anything to get laid. Richard Jeni
October 18, 20186 yr Author Lance Armstrong admitted he used performance-enhancing drugs throughout his career. He confessed in front of the most respected judge in the land, Oprah Winfrey. Craig Ferguson I understand if you want to stay home and watch me on YouTube, but it’s like incest - you’re putting convenience over quality. Emo Philips I think it's a good thing that emotional scars are invisible because if emotional scars were visible porn would be disgusting. Doug Benson I'm all for women who get plastic surgery. Because plastic surgery allows you to make your outer appearance resemble your inner appearance - fake. Daniel Tosh Being an ugly woman is like being a man. You're gonna have to work. Daniel Tosh We come into this world naked, covered in our own blood, screaming in terror - and it doesn't have to stop there if you know how to live right. Dana Gould
November 1, 20186 yr Author great joke on many levels: Two economists are walking down the road when they come across a pile of dog shit lying on the pavement. The first economist says to the other, “If you eat it, I’ll give you £10,000!” The second economist does some number-crunching and figures out he’s better off eating the shit, so he does and collects the money. Continuing along the same road they almost step into yet another pile of dog shit. The second economist says to his friend, “Now, if you eat this pile of shit, I’ll give you £10,000.” After evaluating the proposal, the first economist eats the dog shit and takes the money. They continue on. The first economist starts thinking and fnally says to his friend, “Listen, we both have the same amount of money we had before, but we both ate shit. I don’t see us being better off.” The second economist replies, “True . . . however, there is one important fact you have overlooked”. “What’s that?” “We have both just been involved in £20,000 of trade.”
November 2, 20186 yr Author I went out with a girl last week and she told me she wanted to be “treated like a princess”. So I put her in the back of a Mercedes and drove it into a wall.
November 5, 20186 yr Author A man took his wife to the county show. Among the exhibits were several breeding bulls. They went up to the first pen and there was a sign that read, “This bull mated fifty times last year.” The wife nudged her husband in the ribs and said, “See that? He mated fifty times last year.” They walked a little further and saw another pen, with a sign that read, “This bull mated 100 times last year.” The wife hit her husband and said, “See that? That’s more than twice a week. You could learn something from that bull.” They walked a bit further and came across another, with a sign saying, “This bull mated 365 times last year.” The wife hit him really hard and said: “See that? That’s once a day. You could really learn something from this one.” The husband replied, “Go up and ask him if it was with the same cow.”
December 1, 20186 yr Author White women should suck black dick for payback... You know, reparations..... for slavery!
December 1, 20186 yr I go to the gym religiously, about twice a year around the holidays. -Demetri Martin
December 1, 20186 yr I think most people who describe themselves as "a people person" should check with others before giving themselves that title. - Demetri Martin
January 7, 20196 yr Author A teacher was telling her class how great our political process was, saying "This is the best country. Anybody can grow up and become the President of the United States. You all have a chance." Chong Pin, a chinese boy: "I'll sell you mine for a slim dime!!!!".
January 18, 20196 yr Author I finally figured out why God made man before woman. He didn't want anybody standing behind him, telling him how to make a man...
February 20, 20196 yr Author I sold my married sex life to a toy company! They're going to make a game out of it!!!
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