Bull. Shit. These girls are lying to you. Not purposely, of course - we all say what sounds nice. Hell, they're lying to themselves, because they actually believe it. Sure, we all SAY we want a sweet guy. Maybe in theory we do, but in actuality, the more monotonous you are, the more boring you are. Truth is? We don't have any idea what we want. Not a fucking clue. Do you know what you want in a woman? For life? I bet not, and I bet when you do find that girl she will be nothing like you imagined her to be. What we want and what we'll love are often two very different things. I believe this is human nature. So the question is, what are you looking for? You looking to hook up for a one nighter? Dress nicely but like you don't care, go into wherever your going into, spot a girl, and if she spots you back, go over there and pay attention to her for, oh, 3 or 5 minutes. Look her square in the eyes, like there's no one in the room. Then pull back. Quit looking at her when you talk to her - maybe order a drink if you're at the bar. Not one for her. Just for you. Sooner, if she starts to pull back or seem uninteresited. The key is punishment and reward. She seems into you, she gets rewarded by your attention. Say you reach out and touch her, and she pulls her hand back and looks uncomfortable. Freeze her out for a moment, then come back and try to touch her again. If you play it right, she'll want your attention, so she'll let you touch her the second time. This. Works. It's difficult to master, but the punishment/reward thing works. Practice on someone who's not as hot, that way you feel more confident. Confidence is key. You could get with any chick around. Even if you actually couldn't, you have to think you can. ________________ Now, long term? Long term is trickier. Be her friend but in limited capacity. Only see her -at night.- NEVER during the day, and if you see her in the halls at school or out, make your conversation brief. Only see her during the day when you're dating, and even then in limited quantities. (unless you start to get serious) Be different from her. Opposites attract is a true statement. Don't hang around long enough for her to bitch at you - if she starts talking about her ex or her problems, make an excuse and LEAVE. Don't play hard to get. Do not try and be a bad ass. Do not treat her like a princess. She is not a princess, she is a woman. Maybe the woman you hold in high esteem over every other human being on the face of the planet, but she is a woman. Do not worship, do not prostrate yourself, do NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES give in to her every whim. Treat her well. Do nice things for her. Give your HONEST opinion on things. Show her you care; that you're thinking about her when you're not with her. NOT all the time. Every so often. surprises cease to be surprises when given on a persistant basis. Touch her. Arm. Not the hair or face - too obvious to start with. Later in the relationship, okay. Rub her feet/neck/shoulders/back/legs/arms whatever you can get ahold of on a fairly regular basis, once she's -really- comfortable with you. I'm not even talking deep massage. Touching, a soft light no pressure moving your hand over her skin. Do do massages, but do them when you sense that she needs one. Feet are the best. Yes, they smell. Get over it. Touching and rubbing is a way to a woman's heart. It is hard on any woman to break up with a man who gives a great back massage. Show her that you respect her even when you don't agree, or when she annoys the fuck out of you, both of which which will be OFTEN. If you fight, don't hold onto it. If you need to apologize because you were a jackass, or merely wrong - do it. But if you think you're right, apologize for upsetting her or apologize for how you said it, but not for what you said. Keep the promises you make. Show up on time; being where you say your going to be when you say you'll be there is important. Do not, under any circumstances, lie about your whereabouts; if you're going to a strip club, and you know she won't like it so you don't tell her, when she finds out about it (and she will) you're going to be in bigger trouble than you would be if you told her straight out. Good relationships are about compromise - not just on your side, but on hers as well. And they are HARD. And they are FRUSTRATING. But they are WORTH it, overall.
