7 People Share the Stories Behind Their Scars
We all have scars — some are just more visible than others.
BY ROSEMARY DONAHUE
PHOTOGRAPHY BY CHRISTINE HAHN
July 2, 2019
After the car accident that gave Charlbi her scars, she had a massive amount of healing to do. “I broke my back in two places and my lungs collapsed. My diaphragm burst. My spleen was removed. There were a whole bunch of different things happening at the same time.” All told, it was around a year and a half worth of surgeries and recovery time.
As you can imagine, this process radically changed how she relates to her body. “I think in the beginning my body image was incredibly distorted. You identify with yourself as one thing, and then you go through this massive change and all of a sudden it's like, 'Well, now who am I?'” Especially as an actress and model, she explains that suddenly, it felt like people were only talking to her about her scars. “It's like you can never just be you — it's you with the scars whether or not you want to talk about it. It's always brought up. So I think in that regard, it was a little bit of a thing I didn't ask for.”
At first, she had a lot of complex feelings about her scars. “I feel like a lot of people that go through what I've gone through deal with survivor’s guilt because you almost feel like, ‘Why am I the lucky one?’ Every doctor you see is like, ‘You're lucky to be alive. You're lucky you can walk.’ You actually feel a little guilty for being self-conscious about a scar.” While having perspective can help, she assures other survivors of similar accidents that it’s okay to be insecure. She tells me, “But whatever you're feeling, you are allowed to have those feelings. You're allowed to feel whatever you are feeling. Survivor’s guilt is a real thing.”
She says that now, she thinks her scars are cool and actually prefers they not be Photoshopped out of shoots — she wants people to get used to seeing things like scars, stretch marks, and more in media. “In all honesty, if I could choose, I wouldn't get rid of them. Now, I'm really proud. To me, the fact that I have scars is a sign I've gone through something. And beauty really is in the eye of the beholder — I feel like as human beings, we just find the same things we’re seeing over and over beautiful, but there are so many different variables of beauty and what's interesting.”