one man band

Although i'm fairly sure I didn't post in that particular thread, i'm sure that i had done, i'd have posted something remarkably sweeping and inappropriate. If the thread closure has anything to do with me, I apologise, as I understand that this is an extremely emotional subject for everyone.

is the source of all evil

(j/k)

However, such a post as the ubiquitous Animus has posted above this requires a severe lambasting.

Although the racoon has recorded a triumph far beyond most other animals have lack of intellignet thought renders one bizzarely perturbed. A deep welling of sheer pathos for the poor rodent has left one feeling utterly incapable of salvaging anything useful from any post that deluded creature scrawls on this most shining of boards. A more intelligible response is required for a hearty bellow, hence this wandering perambulation through various diction that hopefully the rodent will not even begin to comprehend. I expect a dictionary and thesaurus will emerge from his pithy hand as soon as the oppurtunity arises. Meanwhile, it will suffice to say that the above post osmoses the proverbial fundament.

(Any mistakes are, of course, deliberate and, if you point them all out, you are eligible for a gold star! Yes!)

If I was as petty as 'Mother', I would point out a rather obvious calamity in Mr. Red's post, but since I am a man of the highest chivalry and discretion, the error will be our little secret old bean. And please do recognise the heavy irony relatively obviously engrained in this post, or I may be reduced to tears.

I will allow one sentence fragment per post, but more are acceptable in longer posts

should definitely not wear cycling shorts 24/7...

I'm afraid that getting angry with me only serves to amuse. Any intellectual superiority you may feel over me by pointing out superflous errors is misplaced. Unless, of course, I managed to perform the impossible, and post something mind-numbingly inferior. A bit more wit, a little less vitriol please.

Only irritatingly mispelt or poorly contructed posts will annoy me. A post such as this, although not strictly adhering to the rules set out in the opening post, does not blight the thread. Sentence fragments are perfectly acceptable as long as there is no exclusive use thereof.

Understand? So shall we return to using this thread as a flaming thread with posh words?

Forgive my lack of mathematical competence, but how many long words are in that post?

Please, next time take a little more care. I want a proper argument. If you are unable to do so, due to an intellectual shortfall or merely a lack of typing ability, such as an unforseen incident involving a ruler and tape-measure, refrain from posting in response to this post.

No.

England win the Ashes. Australia officially suck balls. Warne is disqualified from the game for being too fat.

the Big-Bang

ME: I hate metal

HIM: Why?

ME: Its the musical equivalent of having a sharp metal rod being inserting down your urethra.

HIM: Most people listen with their ears. You should get them checked out.

ME: I want to cut one of them off so I can be famous in a couple of centuries, like van gogh.

HIM: you could donate it to someone looking for a tent (my ears are quite big)

ME: Ha fucking ha

ETC.

Since people around here claimed that they are "well-spoken",

I am going to need help with this.

Fill in the blank below with the most appropriate word.

If I do not share or disagree with your views/opinions/beliefs/attitudes, that means I am ______________ to your cause.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I think the word is "apathetic".

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

The word you are perusing the internet for is "unsympathetic". You steaming pile of bovine effluence.

Any attempts to sabotage this thread have led to a general apathy on my part. I pity the poor fools who think that spoiling my fun by not having a proper conversation will in any amuse anyone other than themselves.

Poppycock. I welcome a structured argument for free speech. I would enjoy a proper argument liberally sprinkled with long words. Have at you!

I'm gonna have a good old bitch.

I hate Bush. I didn't realise just how much I hated him until the Hurricane Katrina debacle. He didn't send aid over immediately because he didn't see it as too much of a problem. That's the truth, and no one in their right minds will dispute it. And he didn't see it as much of a problem because it was mainly black people's houses that were being destroyed. All the rich white people had already scarpered. Just imagine if all those people you see on TV were white. The help would be there in hours. Screw Bush, and screw Middle America. The reason why all the people left behind were the black people is because of the subtle sinister racism that Middle America thinks is OK. The black people don't get good jobs so don't make enough money so can't afford to get out of New Orleans. Racism is still a problem and will remain to be one, possibly indefinitely.

is actually Satan on an off-day.

The post made sense, but any confusion you have now will pale into insignificance when compared to the blanket of ambiguity I shall lay upon your brain.

How in any way are the mods like Nazis? The link between editing a picture and mass genocide needs to be clarified if your argument is going to last longer than donut in front of Michael Moore.

After the fourth day, England are 34-1, with a lead of 40. To win, Australia would have to bowl out England and then beat our score.

The Ashes are coming home. The odds are stacked against Australia, but a final swansong from Warne and McGrath could win the match and square the series.

But seriously. You're screwed.

You gotta love English weather.

I apologise for my brief abscence. As some of you may know, I am a guitar teacher by trade, and since school term has started again, I have much more work to do (I teach at a local school as well as at home). I will endeavour to post as much as I can.

And I am not actually one of those mildly disturbing one man bands, but I can play several instruments, and I did play solo guitar by myself with just a loop pedal for a gig once. It was remarkably good, considering I had never previously used such a device.

Anyway, I digress. Mr Ed, your pithy use of anagrams excuses your transgression, but any further obscenities and you sanity may well be tested by a volley of words containing semantics the likes of which you have never seen!

You suck man. Ever since I met you on chilaX, your posts have been weak and boring. Never once have I managed to manage a smirk without it being due to some grammatical inconsistency!

And you smell!

(your mother).

You've actually come to the right thread. Sad, greasy, stnking, wanna-be musician loser.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I can't really say anything back because all I know about you is that your first name is Chris, you come from Denmark and like Blur. It's not much to go on.

And I'm no wannabe musician, thankyouverymuch. I'm a guitar teacher. Very important difference. Yes.

Easy on the wit there. You'll have Oscar Wilde in trouble.

Final test on Thursday. And yes to MacGill. And this new guy. Can't remember his name. He'll be nervous and screw up.

Your picture of a young blonde lady sticking out her tongue presumably to lick an ice lolly has been (incorrectly) interpreted by Heidegger as a pornographic shot.

The thread where you incoherently babble insults at people who actually have better things to do than think of witty comebacks is missing, so I'll try one here.

Original Sin, your member name sucks ass. Big, fat, orange peel ass. Like Donatella Versace.

stole my witty phrase.

offers ferret for everyone.

This is a contest of sheer wit and vocabulary prowess.