Guest quasicartes Posted February 12, 2005 Share Posted February 12, 2005 From south park movie:Army General: YOU TOLD US THAT WINDOWS 98 WOULD BE FASTER, AND MORE EFFICIENT WITH BETTER ACCESS TO THE INTERNET!Bill Gates: It IS faster! Over five million.....(General Shoots him)Stan: Chef, how do you make a woman like you more than any other guy?Chef: Oh, that's easy! You just gotta find the clitoris!Stan: Huh?Chef: Whoops!!Stan: What does that mean? Find the clitoris?Chef: Uh....uh...forget I said anything!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
avadakedavra Posted February 19, 2005 Share Posted February 19, 2005 ARMY OF DARKNESSDuke Henry: You're not one of my vassals... who are you?Ash: Who wants to know?Duke Henry: I am Henry the Red. Duke of Shale, Lord of the Northlands and leader of its peoples.Ash: Well hello Mister Fancypants. Well, I've got news for you pal, you ain't leadin' but two things: Jack and shit... and Jack just left townAsh: [to the Witch] Yo, she-bitch! Let's go!Ash: Lady, I'm afraid I'm gonna have to ask you to leave the store.Possessed woman: Who the hell are you?Ash: Name's Ash.[cocks shotgun]Ash: Housewares. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
avadakedavra Posted February 19, 2005 Share Posted February 19, 2005 THE GODFATHERSonny: Goddamn FBI don't respect nothin'.Michael: My father is no different than any powerful man, any man with power, like a president or senator.Kay Adams: Do you know how naive you sound, Michael? Presidents and senators don't have men killed.Michael: Oh. Who's being naive, Kay? Jack Woltz: Now you listen to me, you smooth talking son-of-a-bitch. Let me lay it on the line for you and your boss, whoever he is. Johnny Fontane will never get that movie. I don't care how many dago guinea wop greaseball goombahs come out of the woodwork.Michael: My father made him an offer he couldn't refuse.Kay Adams: What was it?Michael: Luca Brasi held a gun to his head, and my father assured the bandleader, that either his signature or his brains would be on the contract. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
avadakedavra Posted February 19, 2005 Share Posted February 19, 2005 THE PRINCESS BRIDEVizzini: HE DIDN'T FALL? INCONCEIVABLE.Inigo Montoya: You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means. Fezzik: We face each other as God intended. Sportsmanlike. No tricks, no weapons, skill against skill alone.Man in Black: You mean, you'll put down your rock and I'll put down my sword, and we'll try and kill each other like civilized people? Vizzini: "Never go in against a Sicilian, when *death* is on the line."Buttercup: You mock my pain.Westley: Life is pain, Highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something. Buttercup: We'll never survive.Westley: Nonsense. You're only saying that because no one ever has. Prince Humperdinck: Surrender.Westley: You mean you wish to surrender to me? Very well, I accept. Fezzik: You just shook your head... doesn't that make you happy?Westley: My brains, his steel, and your strength against sixty men, and you think a little head jiggle is supposed to make me happy? Westley: Give us the gate key.Yellin: I have no gate key.Inigo Montoya: Fezzik, tear his arms off.Yellin: Oh, you mean *this* gate key. Inigo Montoya: Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father: prepare to die. Now, offer me money.[slices Count Rugen's cheek]Count Rugen: Yes.Inigo Montoya: Power too. Promise me that.[slices Count Rugen's other cheek]Count Rugen: All that I have and more. Please...Inigo Montoya: Offer me everything I ask for.Count Rugen: Any thing you want.Inigo Montoya: I want my father back, you son of bitch.[stabs and kills Count Rugan] . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 28, 2005 Share Posted February 28, 2005 Heathers (Good Movie)Veronica Sawyer: So what's the question. Heather Duke: Yeah, so what's the question Heather. Heather Chandler: God damn, Heather, you were with me in study hall when I thought of it. Heather Duke: I forgot. Heather Chandler: You're such a pillowcase. And one of the best movie quotes of all time.. gives me the chills each time I hear it...JawsHooper: You were on the Indianapolis? Brody: What happened? Quint: Japanese submarine slammed two torpedoes into her side, Chief. We was comin' back from the island of Tinian to Leyte. We'd just delivered the bomb. The Hiroshima bomb. Eleven hundred men went into the water. Vessel went down in 12 minutes. Didn't see the first shark for about a half-hour. Tiger. 13-footer. You know how you know that in the water, Chief? You can tell by lookin' from the dorsal to the tail. What we didn't know, was that our bomb mission was so secret, no distress signal had been sent. They didn't even list us overdue for a week. Very first light, Chief, sharks come cruisin' by, so we formed ourselves into tight groups. It was sorta like you see in the calendars, you know the infantry squares in the old calendars like the Battle of Waterloo and the idea was the shark come to the nearest man, that man he starts poundin' and hollerin' and sometimes that shark he go away... but sometimes he wouldn't go away. Sometimes that shark looks right at ya. Right into your eyes. And the thing about a shark is he's got lifeless eyes. Black eyes. Like a doll's eyes. When he comes at ya, he doesn't even seem to be livin'... 'til he bites ya, and those black eyes roll over white and then... ah then you hear that terrible high-pitched screamin'. The ocean turns red, and despite all your poundin' and your hollerin' those sharks come in and... they rip you to pieces. You know by the end of that first dawn, lost a hundred men. I don't know how many sharks there were, maybe a thousand. I do know how many men, they averaged six an hour. Thursday mornin', Chief, I bumped into a friend of mine, Herbie Robinson from Cleveland. Baseball player. Boson's mate. I thought he was asleep. I reached over to wake him up. He bobbed up, down in the water, he was like a kinda top. Upended. Well, he'd been bitten in half below the waist. At noon on the fifth day, a Lockheed Ventura swung in low and he spotted us, a young pilot, lot younger than Mr. Hooper here, anyway he spotted us and a few hours later a big ol' fat PBY come down and started to pick us up. You know that was the time I was most frightened. Waitin' for my turn. I'll never put on a lifejacket again. So, eleven hundred men went into the water. 316 men come out, the sharks took the rest, June the 29th, 1945. Anyway, we delivered the bomb. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 28, 2005 Share Posted February 28, 2005 Office Space Samir: No one in this country can ever pronounce my name right. It's not that hard: Samir Na-gheen-an-a-jar. Nagheenanajar. Michael Bolton: Yeah, well at least your name isn't Michael Bolton. Samir: You know there's nothing wrong with that name. Michael Bolton: There was nothing wrong with it... until I was about 12 years old and that no-talent ass clown became famous and started winning Grammys. Samir: Hmm... well why don't you just go by Mike instead of Michael? Michael Bolton: No way. Why should I change? He's the one who sucks. Michael Bolton: If we get caught, we're not going to white-collar resort prison. No, no, no. We're going to federal POUND ME IN THE ASS prison. Samir: I don't want to go to ANY prison! Milton Waddams: [talking on the phone] And I said, I don't care if they lay me off either, because I told, I told Bill that if they move my desk one more time, then, then I'm, I'm quitting, I'm going to quit. And, and I told Don too, because they've moved my desk four times already this year, and I used to be over by the window, and I could see the squirrels, and they were married, but then, they switched from the Swingline to the Boston stapler, but I kept my Swingline stapler because it didn't bind up as much, and I kept the staples for the Swingline stapler and it's not okay because if they take my stapler then I'll set the building on fire... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blade102384 Posted February 28, 2005 Share Posted February 28, 2005 SpaceBalls"evil will always triumph because good is dumb." "i knew it....im surrounded by assholes" "keep firing assholes" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blade102384 Posted February 28, 2005 Share Posted February 28, 2005 Ace Ventura: When Nature Callsgreat i'll go tell the others! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blade102384 Posted February 28, 2005 Share Posted February 28, 2005 Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged MeWhoopdi Do Basil (sarcastically)What does it all mean Basil? (sarcastically) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hiro Posted February 28, 2005 Share Posted February 28, 2005 BraveheartKing of England"the probly with Scotland is.. ITs full of Scots!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 1, 2005 Share Posted March 1, 2005 Jaw BreakerCourtney: Ok, reality check, Liz is in the trunk of this car. And she is dead. That is a sad, fucked up thing, but you are going to walk into that school and strut your shit down the hallway like everything is peachy fucking keenApocalypse NowKilgore: You smell that? Do you smell that?... Napalm, son. Nothing else in the world smells like that. I love the smell of napalm in the morning. You know, one time we had a hill bombed, for twelve hours. When it was all over I walked up. We didn't find one of 'em, not one stinkin' dink body. The smell, you know that gasoline smell, the whole hill. Smelled like... victory. Someday this war's gonna end... [walks off unhappily] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blade102384 Posted March 4, 2005 Share Posted March 4, 2005 Eurotrip oy! if you're manchester united supporters sing the manchester united song Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
_SohoxChic_ Posted March 4, 2005 Share Posted March 4, 2005 napolean dynamite"tina you fat lard eat your dinner!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 6, 2005 Share Posted March 6, 2005 napolean dynamite"tina you fat lard eat your dinner!"LoL! Con Air Garland Greene: What if I told you insane was working fifty hours a week in some office for fifty years at the end of which they tell you to piss off; ending up in some retirement village hoping to die before suffering the indignity of trying to make it to the toilet on time? Wouldn't you consider that to be insane? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I LOVE ADRIANA Posted March 6, 2005 Share Posted March 6, 2005 SCARFACE:tony- say hello to my lil' friend! :evil: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
safin83 Posted March 6, 2005 Share Posted March 6, 2005 shunghai noon it looks like we got ourselfs a mexican standoff...........except we aint got no mexicans Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blade102384 Posted March 7, 2005 Share Posted March 7, 2005 Blade TrinityYou think thats funny haha go fuck ur sister Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blade102384 Posted March 7, 2005 Share Posted March 7, 2005 Blade TrinityYou Cock Juggling Thunder CuntSORRY I DIDNT MEAN TO OFFEND ANYONE WITH THIS POST AND THE ONE ABOVE Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nebucadnezar Posted March 7, 2005 Share Posted March 7, 2005 Is it Rambo? I thinits Rambo III:- whats this?- its a red light!- what does it do?- it shines red!thanks to the storywriter! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hiro Posted March 7, 2005 Share Posted March 7, 2005 batmantha joker "ever dance with the devil in the pale moon light" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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